Seul Rouge
by sammie503
Summary: When tragedy hits Bella Swan and she's left alone except for her newborn niece, she tries to go on with life. So what does she do when she realizes all of the sudden strange things happening to her are because of the baby. Who's after her niece? And where
1. Prologue

**Prologue**

"What is Mesopotamia?" The jeopardy contestant was getting on my nerves. What is, the fertile crescent, you idiot. The annoying buzzer went off, signaling her mistake. The large, graying man standing behind the podium next to her slammed down on his button much too enthusiastically. He shot her a victorious smirk before answering Alex.

"What is, the fertile crescent?"

"That is correct," I mumbled along with the host before I clicked the remote control and the TV turned off. My head rolled back on it's own, resting on the back of the couch. I'd been in this hospital for fifteen hours. My eyes had bags, my teeth felt grimy and disgusting, I smelled, and the nurses kept trying to admit me.

However I was here for a reason and I had to stay. When Angela had called me at school I knew it was the baby. I shook my head sadly; this was too risky. Doctor Davis had advised her not to go through with this. He said her body not be able to do it. I had begged her to wait, to try again later. She wouldn't listen. Sweet as she was, there was no convincing her to give up that baby. It scared me to death, but I couldn't say I wouldn't do the same. As mad as it made me that she was risking her life, I admired her.

I was in calculus when my phone vibrated in my pocket. When I saw the small name lighting up my screen I freaked. Without a word to Ms. Hhanel I grabbed my stuff hastily and ran out to my car. I smiled at the thought of the car. It was an old, beat up Nissan. Green with rust and always a cherry scented air freshener hanging from the rear-view mirror. I loved it the second Angela drove it into our driveway. That was when I was sixteen and Angela was eighteen.

"It has character," she told me. "Plus it's trash so it's not so bad if you crash it." But I never did crash it.

The loud click-clack of heels on the linoleum tiles brought me back to the moment.

"Miss Swan?" A hesitant voice came from behind me and I whipped around, instantly anxious. The nurse moved around the couch to face me. She was small and young, couldn't have been that much older than Angela and she looked scared. She played with her fingers nervously.

"Yes?"

"Your sister is bleeding out. The doctor is doing an emergency cesarean section. She asked for you," she said quickly with pity in her eyes. I didn't wait to thank her but ran down the hall to my sister's room. I knew that I shouldn't have left Angela's side. She had insisted I try to sleep out on the couch. I knew I wouldn't be able to but I left to please her. Even when she was in labor she worried about me. It was a difficult first few hours. Her contractions were too quick and she was in so much pain.

When I'd gotten out to my car I sped home to find Angela waiting for me outside the apartment on the front steps, bags and all. How she managed to stay so calm, I don't know. She was already practicing her breathing and everything. When we'd made it to the hospital I led her to the front desk where I checked her in and they took her to her room.

They'd gotten her all ready and judging from the contractions they thought the delivery would be soon. Everything was going great, they said. No need for emergency actions, they told me. She's tough, she can do this naturally without a doubt, they assured me. Even with their reassurances I felt it in my gut. I knew something was going to go wrong.

I ground my teeth together angrily, asking myself why she was being put through all of this. Hasn't she had enough? Tears filled my eyes, burning them. My heart was beating a thousand times a minute, my palms began to sweat and I struggled to control my breathing. When I reached Angela's door I paused outside the window. Inside I could see Angela finally losing her cool. She was grinding her teeth and bunching up the sheets in her fingers. Her pain scared me, but with a deep breath, I flicked a stray hair out of my face and marched in.

"Bella?"

Her face was drenched with sweat, the beads mixing with her tears. Her golden-brown hair was matted and in a sticky, messy bun on the top of her head. She was struggling, I could see, which scared me more than anything. I fought the urge to run away screaming and took my sister's hand.

"What's happening?" I demanded. The young doctor I'd met many times before with Angela was there, sitting on a stool positioned between my sister's open legs. He didn't look up when I spoke.

"Your niece doesn't seem to want to come out," he said to me, trying to remain calm but not succeeding. His voice shook a little with the struggle. I glared irately at him. I could have told you that twelve hours ago, dumbass. "We're preparing for a c-section now. We've given her some medication for the pain already, Miss Swan."

I looked back at the bed and Angela's hands had already loosened around the sheets. I nodded approvingly, at least her pain wasn't as bad, although I could still tell when she had a contraction because her legs twitched.

"Bella," she breathed. I leaned in closer to her and I could smell the sweat and tears on her face.

"I'm here, honey." I assured her. I didn't want her thinking she was alone in this. She had me.

"I know." A small smile flitted across her features and the tiny gesture gave me relief and hope. "The baby, Bella… Cassie."

I glanced warily at the doctor and he answered my unspoken question.

"She seems to be okay but we need to act fa-" he was cut off by Angela's shriek of long and unexpected pain. We all cringed away from the sound momentarily.

"Oh God!" She moaned and tossed in the small bed.

"What's happening?" I was panicking now. Full blown, no going back, fear. The horrified look on Dr. Davis's face made me a little woozy, but not half as bad as the puddle of blood at his feet did. He quickly stood and motioned at the nurse behind him.

"The baby's coming. Now." His voice was worried. My head started to spin and I knew I was fainting. I felt like I was sinking down, down, down. But my sister's strangled scream brought me to the surface like a lifejacket.

"So start the c-section already!" I begged, shaking my head to clear it. He glanced at me pitifully before pulling Angela's gown up higher, exposing her.

"It's too late for that. Your sister will have to give natural birth if she wants the baby to live." My heart stopped and then picked up double time.

"But she can't! It'll kill her!" I knew her body wasn't strong enough. She was too weak for this. I could tell by her glazed over eyes that she was fading now.

"No." She whispered to me, struggling to sit up in the bed. I pushed her back down angrily. What was she trying to do? Kill herself quicker? "Save Cassie, Bella. Save her."

"Shut up, you're being stupid. You can't expect me to let y-"

"Save. The. Baby." she growled, though her words were slightly garbled. "Bella. Please."

It only took a second for me to nod at the doctor before he started to poke and prod at her. It only took a second for me to sentence her death, to give my approval. Was I killing her? Angela moaned; I guess the medication wasn't working anymore. She's in pain! I wanted to scream. Don't just let her suffer! I needed to shout at them. So why didn't I say anything? Why was I stuck there at her bedside in shock?

"Okay Angela, I know you're tired but you need to push okay? Push for Cally." The doctor was looking frantic now. He was young, not even thirty and couldn't have had too much experience. A pang of guilt hit me hard. I should have gotten better for her. She should be completely relaxed, not feeling a thing in a large, comfy room with an experienced doctor saving her and the baby. Not in this small, cramped closet with a doctor hardly older than her.

"It's Cassie you idiot!" I snapped at him, holding Ang's weak hand in my own. She wasn't squeezing anymore so I did, trying to keep her awake. Her moans of pain hit me home.

I should have done better. I should have done better. I should have done better.

"Angela push! Push!" He panicked, ignoring me.

"I can't!" she shrieked, breathing in heavily and finally squeezing back on my hand. I ignored the pain as I focused on what I was about to do.

"Push Angela. Push for Cassie okay? You can sleep after this one. Just one big push and you can sleep. Just push for the baby." I whispered to her, not wanting the doctor or nurses to hear what I was doing to her. I was killing her now, wasn't I?

"I can't." She cried, chest heaving and legs twitching. I brushed back her hair.

I should have done better. I should have done better. I should have done better.

"Yes you can," I assured her. Tears spilled down my cheeks and I rethought my actions quickly. Did she really want to give up or did she want me to push her still to save the baby? Was she scared now? I was shaking of fear. What would I do without my big sister? She dropped out of college when our parents died to take care of me. She was all I had. We depended on each other. But this moment, as she lay there shrieking, I knew I was on my own.

I should have done better. I should have done better. I should have done better.

"I - I can'tahhhh!" Another fit of contractions pulsed through her body. I cringed away, but held her hand fast. I couldn't let go of her now. She couldn't do this alone.

"Come on Angela, push." Dr. Davis shouted over her shouts and my sobs, urging her while his hands moved under her gown. She moaned and writhed, the pain overtaking her.

"She can't!" I screamed back at him. Didn't he see her pain? My tears splashed on Angela's naked stomach. My eyes were fixed on the huge bump on her abdomen. Could it really have been just yesterday that Angela fell asleep on the couch while rubbing her belly? Was it only hours ago that our faces lit up with huge smiles when Cassie kicked her stomach playfully?

"She has to," he said to me, bringing my eyes back to his. I blinked at his pained expression. Once, twice, three times. "I can't deliver the baby without her."

My tears were coming down without delay now, cascading like waterfalls. I hunched over Angela and a few fell onto her face, mixing with her own tears. Her eyes were barely open. When the contractions ended, they left her body weaker.

"Angela! Wake up! Wake up now!" I tugged at her arm, slapped her face, shook her shoulders. She wouldn't move. "Wake up Angela! No, no, no!"

The sobs wracked my entire body now. I hung my head uselessly. That's when I noticed my shoes were blood red. The puddle of blood was more like a lake now, and still growing.

"Oh my God," I whispered. I blinked rapidly in shock.

"Nurse I'm going to have to cut."

I was spinning out of control. Red was everywhere. On the bed, on her legs, her stomach, her feet, the floor, the sheets, the doctor's whole front, my shoes. Blood, everywhere. She was bleeding dry. How was it happening so fast?

"Here, take her Nurse," he said. I heard a large splash, accompanied with the wetness I felt on my feet, the shrieking of a baby, and the heart-breaking sobs that ripped from my chest. No moans, only a sigh of pity and regret from the nurse who now held Cassie.

I stumbled back into the chair I'd sat in for hours, talking to my sister. Slowly, my eyes closed and I tried not to think of all of the red…

…she didn't even scream when he cut her, I realized. She was already gone.

**A/N**: So what do you think? I've been playing with this for a while now and I'm a little nervous letting you guys see it. Umm, I'm not sure if I'll continue with it but I definitely will if you want me to. I haven't been writing fics for a while, just lurking around, and I miss it. So this is my attempt to get back in there. Reviews are bliss, as is Edward without a shirt....oh, and Edward _will_ be in this. I mean, I shudder at the thought of it without him.


	2. Chapter 1

**Chapter One**

"Angela? Angela please honey, wake up," I begged, shaking her limp form. She was already colder, and considerably paler. A nurse was tugging at my arms uselessly, trying to pull me away from the last I had of a family. No, I chided myself. I had Cassie now. She was my family. It didn't matter. Her attempts were hopeless, nothing could tear me from Angela now. I had to keep her here with me. I was sure I was dreaming. And if I was, how could I let them take her God-knows-where? When she woke, what would she think of me? Would she think I abandoned her too easily? That I didn't fight for her? Well I couldn't let her think that.

"Ms. Swan, she's not coming back."

"She hasn't gone anywhere, dumbass," I snapped, finally fed up with his crap. He sighed heavily and out of the corner of my eye I saw the slightest twitch of his hand towards the nurse. The next second I was in the air, two thick arms wrapped around my waist and pulling me up. I shrieked desperately. It wasn't a scream, or a cry, but a tortured sob of emotional pain breaking through the surface. It went on for a long time -what felt like hours- and I felt my ears pop. My eyes started to strain even though they were closed and I could feel myself losing control. The unfamiliar arms were strong though, and they held fast against my frenzied claws and bites. One particular bite caused him to yelp in pain and I was almost shocked at myself.

"Damnit, knock that off!" His arms constricted around my slim waist harshly as if to make a point. It seemed to say 'Behave or I won't be so gentle.' When I turned in his arms slightly, I saw his expression saying the same thing. I sighed and turned back towards the bed. Angela laid there still, nothing changing and I broke. My insides shattered into a thousand tiny pieces, scattered around me on the cold, hard, hospital floor. When I looked down at them they were pieces of a mirror and I saw myself reflected back in them. All of them. A thousand, tiny me's on the tiles. As my body relaxed, I felt the arms calm as well. Soon my feet touched the floor… and I ran, nearly tripping, back to my sister's side.

Her hair had fallen out of it's bun at some point and the long locks cascaded down her shoulders now. I flinched away; even her hair looked paler. How could I have let this happen? Before I could be dragged away again I buried my face in her hair and let out a few sobs. After a few moments I noticed that I wasn't the only one crying. But who was…Cassie?

"Cassie? Cassie!?" I pulled my face out of Angela's hair and looked around for the baby.

"Cassie?" I cried, sitting up in my bed. In the basinet beside the bed, my niece wailed, much like I had been in my dream. Hot tears were streaming down my face and I hurriedly wiped them away, swinging my legs out of the bed to sit up.

"Shhh. It's okay," I lied, plucking her out of the bed. It wasn't going to be okay, it could never be okay. Cassie instantly calmed in my arms. I sighed in relief, thankful that my niece took after her mother. Nice and quiet… most of the time. "Everything will be okay."

I swiveled in the dark, eyes squinting to find the bedside table. When I located it, I reached out a hand to pick up the pacifier I knew was there. My hand smoothed over the alarm clock, the lamp base, my bottle of water… success. With a light finger I traced Cassie's face to find her little mouth. When I located it I replaced my finger with the pacifier and she greedily took it in her lips. She sucked hungrily and I knew I'd need to feed her quickly, before she realized the toy gave her no food.

I wasn't as tired as I thought I should be after getting up several times each night for a week. Maybe it was the nightmares that woke me up, ready to care for Cassie's every need. I didn't know. I'd had them every night. Not always the same, always changing a little bit. Some nights they changed so much that, like tonight, I don't even realize I'm dreaming. Those ones are the worst. I'm always scared that I won't wake up, that it won't be a dream. More than anything, I feel guilt after the dreams. I should have done better for Angela. Having to relive those last moments over and over again every night must be the price I have to pay for not giving her more.

I stood from Angela's bed with her child in my arms and made my way to the door. I'd been sleeping in here lately. I'd be lying if I said it was only for the convenience. Sure, all of the baby things were in here, but it also smelled like her. I found that if I showered before bed now instead of in the morning, by the time I woke up, I'd smell like her too. It was an amazing smell. Like honey and cherries. How she did it I'll never know. She used the same strawberry shampoo I did, and I could never find any perfume either. I shook my head, frustrated. I guess I'll never know.

My feet padded softly down the cold hallway into the kitchen where I flicked on the light. Yesterday I had made the last adjustments to the apartment, which mostly consisted of unscrewing a few light bulbs to a dim for the sake of my eyes and buying a few extra locks for the front door.

Cassie opened her eyes, watching me quietly while I prepared her formula. That was one thing we hadn't thought to buy in the last nine months. We figured Angela was all we'd need in that department. I closed my eyes for a moment, listening to the microwave hum loudly. Angela's funeral had been two days before, small and quaint.

With all of the expenses of a baby, the loss of Angela's income, and everything else that went along with it, I didn't have a lot of money to spare. She was buried in the town's cemetery with a small headstone engraved with her name, dates of birth and death, and the words 'beloved sister and mother'. It still put me back a bit but she deserved at least that much. It was only me and the reverend at the burial. It was early in the morning, just six-o-clock and it was especially misty. I couldn't see more than a few feet around us. He said the usual words and gave me a reassuring pat on the arm.

"Is it true she left behind a child?" he had asked me, leaning in close, giving me a hug. I nodded, knowing I wouldn't be able to speak without my voice breaking. He lingered for a moment before pulling back from me. I watched him curiously. His face looked torn. "Look Bella, I know you and Angela haven't been here long but I've seen you two grow these past couple of years. When you came here, right after your parents passed, well I could tell you relied on each other. You got by and after a while you were able to be happy again."

He paused, a sad smile floating across his features. His face turned serious again.

"You don't have her this time. I'm worried how you're taking this. Maybe, with everything that's happened, and all of the changes in your life right now…"

"Yes?" I croaked, wiping my eyes. The mist made them water even more. My thick lashes were heavier and made my eyelids droop. I squinted up at him.

"Well maybe you shouldn't push yourself. Maybe you should think about taking it easy for a while. You haven't even finished school yet."

"What are you trying to say?" I didn't understand what he was getting at. He couldn't possibly be trying to say that I should…

"Are you sure you can take care of the baby?" he asked, staring into my eyes. I could tell he was serious and expected an answer. I flinched away from him. How could he think I'd ever give up Cassie? She's family. Sure I wasn't her mother but I'm all she has in the world. I couldn't abandon her. How could I do that to Angela? She sacrificed herself for that child, I wouldn't deny her that she grow up with the ones who love her: me.

"Of course I can!"

"You're only eighteen," he reminded me. I fumed. So just because I was young, I couldn't take care of my own flesh and blood?

"She's family! And I won't give her up. She belongs with me." I had to blink rapidly in order to see him clearly. He was getting foggier. He took a step back, checking himself. He hung his head. Maybe he was ashamed, or he could hear the certainty in my voice, I don't know.

"Of course, I'm sorry Bella. I didn't mean to imply that you couldn't care for her. I just thought that you might want to worry about yourself for now. I just wanted to let you know… that that would be okay. You deserve," he paused and something flitted across his features. "I know that you loved Angela very much. She was… lucky to have you."

I only nodded in reply.

"Well, I'll leave you now. But I want you to know that you can come to me anytime. Infants are a lot of work, if you need a babysitter or anything, my wife and I can help you."

"Yes, thank you Reverend Holz," I responded, eager for him to leave me. He nodded and opened his mouth to say something more. I looked up, waiting for it. He shook his head, more to himself than to me and closed his mouth again before turning and disappearing into the mist.

_Ding!_ The microwave beeped loudly, snapping me out of my thoughts. I was thankful for it. Though I knew the reverend was a good man, he was active in the community and loved spending time with his wife and young daughter, that much was obvious, there was something off about him that day. I couldn't pinpoint it, and maybe it was just me and all of the emotions of the occasion, but he seemed… off.

I took the bottle out of the microwave and shook it lazily in my hand while carefully cradling Cassie with my other arm. Her bright blue eyes widened just the tiniest bit when she spotted the bottle and I smiled at how smart she was. She already knew what the bottle meant: _food!_ As I gazed into her eyes lovingly, lowering the warm bottle to her mouth, I realized something. Where did she get her eyes? My hand froze, the bottle hovering just out of her reach. My own eyes were a deep brown, like chocolate. Angela's had been a light hazel and both our parents had been the same. As far as I knew, blue eyes really weren't in our family. Cassie let out a loud shriek of impatience, bringing my attention back to her.

_Sorry honey_, I thought, lowering it again. She sucked hungrily at the bottle and I watched the liquid drain.

When Angela had told me she was pregnant one of the first things I asked her was of course: Who's the father? I thought back to that day. We'd been standing right there, in the kitchen of our tiny apartment. I was making chili at the stove while Angela sat at the counter drinking lemonade. I could feel her watching me as I stirred but I didn't mind. She often watched me while I cooked. Sometimes she would stand in the doorway watching me for hours while I baked cookies, made stew, stirred iced tea. I never asked her why she did it, but it seemed natural. Often I would ask her if she'd like to help but she always declined, not that I needed her help. I knew my way around a kitchen.

I was adding the kidney beans to the mixture when she said it.

"I'm pregnant." Her voice was strong and decided. I almost wanted to laugh, thinking she must be joking. And if she were anybody else, I would have laughed. But I knew Angela and I knew that when she said something important, she meant it. I was still startled though and dropped the whole can of beans into the pot. It took me a few minutes to dig the metal can out with my wooden spoon. When I'd successfully extracted it, I slowly turned around to face my sister.

"W-who… who's the father?" I asked, carefully not looking her in the eye. I didn't want her to know how bad I was freaking out. We didn't have money for a baby!

"James."

I couldn't hold in my alarm this time.

"JAMES? What the hell Angela?" I yelled, waving around my dirty spoon like a mad-woman. She waited patiently, not looking affected at all. What's done is done, her look said. I fumed. How could she sleep with… James? Shivers ran down my spine. I went on.

"James? What were you thinking? Angela, James Gainer is…" I couldn't even wrap my head around the thought of them together. James was, to say the least, a terrible, terrible person. The total opposite of Angela. He was Angela's age and a legend at the high school… still. He was the total badass that every girl wanted to tame. Half of the girls at school had deluded themselves into thinking that they would be the one to change him. Needless to say, nobody ever did. Even though I despised the way he acted, his attitude toward everyone he encountered and his stupid motorcycle, I had to admit: James was a real fox. His wild blond hair, just like the rest of him, could not be contained for long. His deep hazel eyes penetrated your soul in a way you thought impossible. He was… incredibly sexy. "… a terrible person."

She didn't blink an eye.

"Not to me." And she wasn't lying. Everybody loved Angela. She was a sweet, quaint girl who minded her own business. She was kind to everybody she met, even James. When we moved here, I listened to people's warnings. _Stay away from James, Bella_, they told me. _He's not a good guy_, a few whispered. _A bad egg_, my elderly neighbor passed on. I stayed away from him, not wanting his attention anyway, but Angela didn't think anything about it when he asked her for a pen in class.

"Of course," she answered, handing him an extra Bic out of her bag. I was also in that class and I wasn't the only person gawking. He said thank you, quite unexpectedly, and smiled slightly at her. She turned back towards the front of the class, unaffected. I watched him however, trying to discover his intention. He didn't wear the usual smirk of determination he usually did after speaking to a future victim. He didn't even look away from the board. I thought it strange that he was in class at all, let alone taking notes.

That wasn't the only time he was seen with my sister. It wasn't unusual to see them talking in the hallway or at the vending machines. A couple times I would meet Angela for lunch and he'd be at the table when I arrived. He always left soon after though, throwing one of his infamous winks my way as he passed. I always scowled to myself, wondering why he was so polite to Angela. Though it wasn't that peculiar; you couldn't help but be just as sweet to Angela as she was to you.

"James?" I verified. She nodded. "When?"

"About four weeks ago," she replied. "I'm sorry I didn't tell you."

"Jeez Ang, I didn't know that you and James were like-"

"We aren't!" she assured me. "It was a one time thing. Honestly, I think it would be best if… well if we kept it to ourselves." She blushed, probably at the thought of everyone finding out she had slept with James. That the whole time, he had been playing her. I sighed and walked to Angela, wrapping my arms around her from behind and resting my chin on her shoulder.

"Does he know?" I mumbled.

"Yes, and he agrees that nobody should know if not absolutely necessary."

I nodded in agreement. Nobody should know Angela's mistake.

"So what do we do?" I asked. How would this end?

I never imagined that it would end with Angela's death. I shuddered at the thought. Maybe blue eyes were in James' family, not that I would ever ask him. For the last nine months it took every last ounce of control to stop myself from launching myself at James and clawing his eyes out every time I saw him on that dumbass motorcycle. He never came by the apartment that I knew of and rarely called for Angela. He didn't offer to pay for anything, not that we would've taken any money from him. We'd been taking care of ourselves for years by then and didn't need James or his money. I remembered one incident when I ran into him at the local Red Apple grocery store.

"Hello Bel-la," he sang my name, playing with me. My jaw locked and I ground my teeth. Slowly I turned around, a glare already in place. He smiled hugely at my expression. "Oh relax Miss Bella. I'm just here to pick up a few things."

He lifted his right arm slightly, showing me the contents in his hand basket. A six pack of Miller Light, some tortillas, and a package of beef. Was it taco night at the Gainer residence? I rolled my eyes and turned back to the cashier who was still checking out my items.

The worker, Marvin, scanned my box of tampons and stuck them in the bag. I blushed despite myself and it didn't go unnoticed my James. He chuckled in my ear.

"So that's why you're so cold. Just that time of the month eh?" He chuckled again and poked me in the side. I whipped around, done with his bullshit.

"Well they sure as hell aren't for Angela are they James?" I raised my eyebrows suggestively and smirked. He scowled before giving me a tight glare.

"You don't know what you're talking about Bella."

"Oh I don't? So she's been stuffing slightly bigger pillows under her shirt every month?" I smiled sweetly, proud of myself for standing up to him, even just a little bit. He stared at me for a long time. I didn't look away from his eyes that seemed to be darkening. Was he trying to intimidate me or tell me something? Intimidate me, it was definitely a little scary. I was distracted for a minute and didn't here the cashier trying to get my attention.

"Miss Swan?!" Marvin snapped his fingers in front of my face. When I switched my gaze to him he smiled apologetically. "I'm sorry, but you're all ready."

"Oh, okay. Thank you." I replied, angry that James had distracted me even for a second. My face flushed with anger.

"Would you like some help out?" Marvin, a sweet guy my age, fretted. He must have regretted snapping at me and I immediately felt guilty. He probably thought I was angry with him. I cleared my face until there was a passable smile.

"No thank you Marvin. Have a nice day though." I waved as I walked away, out towards my car on the other side of the parking lot.

"Oh Bella!" a sarcastic voice called out from behind me. I looked up to the sky, leaning my head back. _Why me? Why today?_ I set my bags down on the trunk of the Nissan and sighed.

"What?" I snapped, turning around to see James strutting towards me. With his bag of groceries under his arm, the beer in his hand and a piece of paper in the other, he took his sweet time getting to me.

"You forgot your receipt and poor Marvin almost wet himself when he realized. Being the great citizen that I am, I offered to bring it to you." I dragged my feet towards him and we stood in the middle of the parking lot. A car was waiting for us to move. I took a step back but James obviously had no intention on moving. With a heavy sigh I quickly moved to grab the receipt from his hand. He pulled his hand back immaturely and smirked.

"Yeah, some great citizen," I scoffed. His smirk fell and he walked right at me. I stepped back as he came towards me and the car drove on by. He scowled down at me, now only a foot away.

"Oh but I am. You have no idea the good deeds I do around here." His hand moved towards me and I flinched away. It passed my face and went behind me. He shoved my receipt into one of the brown bags and turned to leave. I had the urge to yell something after him but couldn't think of anything good enough. I settled for a few profanities under my breath. What did he mean 'good deeds'? He'd rather eat his own hand than open a door for someone. Wouldn't want to damage his reputation, would he?

My teeth were grinding just from the thought of James.

Where was he now? Now that I was alone with _his_ baby? Not that he would ever get her. I guess I was a little relieved that he stayed away. It wasn't put in the newspaper, but it had made it's way around town. I'd hear more than a few versions of the tale. And yet he still hadn't called. Didn't he wonder at all about his baby? Was I the only one in the town that wants to care for it's own family?

Cassie had finished her bottle then and I lifted her to my shoulder to burp her. I might have been the youngest in our family but I had babysat since I was thirteen. Thankfully, I knew how to care for a baby. When she let out a loud belch I smiled, praising her profusely.

"Now what should we do Cassie?" I wondered aloud. I checked the clock on the stove and it was already five. I continued to talk to the smiling baby in my arms. "Right you are honeycakes, we have to go to the school today, don't we?"

I didn't want to drop out completely. My plan was to go on like Angela and I had planned. I'd stay in school, keep working my job at the bookstore, and Angela would stay at home with the baby. Obviously that wasn't going to work and I'd thought about this for a few days. I'd go to school, keep working, and I'd have to leave Cassie with a sitter. There was a child care center in the high school for all of the mothering staff and students but I wasn't sure if I wanted her in there. I knew that it was an actual class and students got to work in there and take care of the children but could I really trust her with a bunch of sophomores and freshmen? Anybody could take the class and it worried me. But if she were in there, I could see her at lunch and during my free periods. She'd always be nearby.

I'd think more about that later. Today I needed to go in and get a week or so excused until I could work everything out. I wasn't worried, surely they would understand, it was just something on my to-do list. I sat down last night and made a list. Most of it centered around Cassie now that Angela…

"Well now that you're fed…" I trailed off, trying to distract myself from those thoughts.

The school opened at seven so I had some time to kill. After frying myself some eggs I laid Cassie down for a nap and took a shower. I left the bathroom door open and slipped off my sweats and tank top, letting them fall to the floor in a heap. I turned the water on hot and let the steam collect and waft out to the open hallway. I stepped inside, taking a deep breath. The water immediately relaxed me and shivers ran through my body. How did it come to this? How had everything gone so wrong? When did I become the one that had to plan funerals and find babysitters and get time off of school to take care of a baby? When did that become me?

Why did I have to deal with it all on my own without even the help of that jackass James? It's _his _baby for Christ's sake! I allowed myself this small time while in the shower to just cry. I was masked by the steam and water running down my body. It was the only time I had to just… be an eighteen year old kid who had no idea what the hell she was doing. I took this time and I got as much out of it as I could because I knew that when I stepped out of this tub I would have to be a grown up. I was the adult in the outside. But behind this curtain, much like an actor off stage, I was just me. Just Bella.

The tears came to a halt when the hot water did. I stepped out, wrapped a towel around me and checked on Cassie.

Quickly dressing in jeans and a tank top, I prepared to leave. It was just now six thirty and I wanted to get there before all of the student body did. The earlier I got there, the less stares, questions and rumors I'd have to deal with. I dressed Cassie in the cute one-sie that Angela picked out. It was white and sunny yellow. She didn't fuss, bless her, when I loaded her into the car seat with a blanket. She closed her eyes quickly and went back to her nap.

"You are such a good baby," I applauded her. I slipped on my sneakers and walked out to the car, soaking up the Phoenix sun.

The drive to the school was short and I was glad that I left when I did. Only a few dozen cars were in the parking lot compared to the usual crap load. Most of them were in the faculty parking spaces. I took my pick of the many open spaces in front of the office and unfastened Cassie's car seat from the car. Carrying her, still in her seat, towards the office, I saw that Mrs. Booth, the head secretary was already at her desk. It wasn't quite seven yet but I didn't think she'd mind. She wasn't alone when I entered the big building. The office alone was bigger than some of the classrooms and she didn't hear me enter. I wondered where the bell was. Usually it sounded every time somebody opened the door.

Her back was to me along with Mr. Tinkle's. He was a freshman math teacher and the JV basketball coach. I didn't want to disturb them since I technically shouldn't even be in here yet so I quietly sat down at one of the tables in the large sitting room and set Cassie's car seat on the table top. I didn't mean to eavesdrop but I couldn't help myself when I heard Angela's name.

I really wasn't surprised that it was being talked about, but it still hurt.

"-Angela Swan died right after giving birth," Mr. Tinkle said rather loudly. I cringed.

"Oh yes. But I heard it was before she had the baby." Mrs. Booth replied, shuffling some papers around with a saddened look on her face. I was half tempted to make a noise, anything but what they were saying was pretty accurate and I wondered how much they knew.

"Maybe, but her sister, Bella right? She's all alone with the baby now. Raising it on her own. Wouldn't hear of giving it up," he grunted. I glared at his back. He made it seem like I took my sister's baby out from under her. How could I give her up? And where would she go? God, people are so stupid.

"Well that's sweet. Really brave," her voice was full of pity and I remembered that Angela used to TA for Mrs. Booth when she was at school.

"Or really stupid. I guess we'll just see how-" I cut him off with a fake sneeze. They both whipped around, startled. Mr. Tinkle flushed.

"Bella! How nice to see you, dear." Mrs. Booth welcomed me. I gave a sad smile in return. Mr. Tinkle said nothing and scurried out of the room as quickly as possible. I ignored him and stayed focused.

"Bella, I am so sorry about Angela. She was such a sweet thing. I can't imagine how you must be feeling right now." Mrs. Booth was always a nice woman. She knew almost every student's name and that was really saying something. This was a big school. She would help anybody who asked for it and had a motherly feel to her. She was a few inches shorter than me with short, brown hair and skin much tanner than mine.

"Thank you Mrs. Booth," I nodded, looking at my lap. I stood form my chair and walked to her desk with the car seat hanging from my arm. "Um, I'm just here to see if I could get some time… well, off of school. Maybe a week? I just, need to get everything sorted out, you know?"

"Of course Bella. Let's see," she looked away sadly and started typing on her keyboard. I saw that she brought up my attendance records. "Alright, you've only missed two days since you've been here and I'm sure that you still intend to graduate? You'll be back?"

"Yes, of course. I just need a few days to find a babysitter and whatnot." The car seat was getting heavy but I didn't want to put Cassie down on the floor. I carefully set her on the desktop which brought Mrs. Booth's attention. Her eyes lingered on the seat and I shifted uneasily.

"Yes, yes of course." Her voice was distracted and I wished I had had somewhere to leave Cassie. I didn't like it that students were starting to arrive and my car was not alone now. With a glance out the window, I saw a couple girls walking towards the office. I didn't know them but that wasn't out of the ordinary. I didn't know a lot of people.

"So I'll be excused then?" I verified. She did a little more typing and then nodded, turning to me with a kind smile.

"Yes Bella, and if you ever need anything…" I smiled back at her, knowing that it was total bullshit. People always say that. _If you ever need anything_… well what? What will you ever do if I need anything? If I called you in the middle of the night or just showed up at your house, what would _you_ do? What could you do? You don't even know me, but you want to make yourself feel like you're helping me out. Well it's bullshit. You're bullshit. This is all complete bullshit. My anger flared and I turned to leave before I voiced my opinions. I needed to get out of here.

I hurried out the door, bumping hard into the two girls with my shoulder. They turned with glares to watch me walk away but I kept going. I didn't stop until I reached the car.

I pulled my list out of my bag once I was on the highway. I needed to stop by the hospital and pick up all of the papers. Cassie's birth certificate and whatnot, and Angela's things too. I didn't want to think about it. I wanted to get in, get out, be done with it. So I turned on my exit and soon I was walking back into the place that I was nowhere near ready to walk back into. It took several tries to get out of the car and even more to unhook Cassie. When I finally built up the courage to walk in the door I had gone turbo. I speed walked, as fast as was safe for Cassie, to the front desk where I saw a terrifyingly familiar nurse. I didn't want to see her, I didn't want to see the doctor, or the waiting room, or the dreaded death certificate. I didn't want to see any of it but I saw all of it when I closed my eyes.

_Red was everywhere. On the bed, on her legs, her stomach, her feet, the floor, the sheets, the doctor's whole front, my shoes. Blood, everywhere_.

I had to blink several times before I could shake the images.

"Hello, I'm here to pick up…" Gulp. Blink. Gulp. Breath, Bella, breath. "some papers." The nurse recognized me too and instant pity was in her eyes. She began playing with her fingers which made me want to scream. She opened her mouth and said something but all I heard was, _"Your sister is bleeding out. The doctor is doing an emergency cesarean section. She asked for you." _

I blinked again and she looked at me curiously. I needed to say something back to her.

"Thank you."

"I'll be right back." And she walked away. I stumbled back into a chair, relieved. She walked back into the waiting room a moment later and scurried over to me, glancing behind her a few times. She looked strange and I tried to concentrate.

"Here are the papers Ms. Swan, have a nice day." she said robotically, handing me an envelope. I nodded and left as quickly as I could.

Even though I all but ran down to my car, some how, the small nurse was standing, hunched over, near my car. How did she know which was my car? How did she get down here so fast? And why was she hear?

"Hello?" I asked, not sure what else to say.

"Ms. Swan! Thank God, okay listen." She looked worried, scared almost. "Can we talk in your car maybe?"

"Um…" I didn't know if I wanted this woman in my car, especially when I had Cassie with me.

"Please, it's about your niece." I leaned back, surprised. What could she have to tell me? "And you're sister."

"Angela?"

"Please, I need to talk to you." Her green eyes looked so sincere that I couldn't help it. I unlocked the doors and motioned for her to get in the passenger seat. When we were all in I turned to her.

"What is it?" She was making me anxious. My stomach was twisting and I didn't know what to make of it.

"After your sister died," I flinched away from her voice. She didn't pause though. "people came looking for her baby. Your niece. I didn't know what to make of it, seeing as I figured they would go to you. I told them that she wasn't at the hospital anymore and I wasn't sure where she was. They got angry."

"Who are they?" I glanced back at Cassie, just to make sure she really was safe and secure, where she should be.

"I have no idea. A man, blonde hair, and a woman, small and blonde as well. They were so… calm, yet their eyes… were so hostile." she shook her head, clearing it. "I didn't know what to do, I didn't trust them I knew you were on your own. Should I have told them? Do you know them?"

"I don't know them. I don't… I just don't know." I whispered, resting my head on the steering wheel. She took my hand in hers.

"Look all I know is that they looked like bad people. They wanted your niece and if I were you, I wouldn't wait for them to find me." She was editing, keeping something from me. Her voice was uneasy and she spoke slowly, watching her words. What wasn't she telling me?

"What are you saying?"

"I'm saying…" she leaned in close, although she placed her hand on the door handle. "Keep the child safe. Hide her away somewhere, leave and take her with you, watch your back, find a safe place, something. I'm saying that they are after her and they looked like they wanted to hurt her."

A tremor wracked my body. She was still editing but I didn't have time to question her. She was already out of the car and jogging back into the hospital. Why would somebody be after Cassie? We didn't even know very many people. Unless if they were connected with work or school, and I doubted that was the case, then I wouldn't know them. _I_ wouldn't know them. But Angela might.

I started the car after a few tries. My hands were shaking and I couldn't help myself from glancing back at Cassie's sleeping form every few seconds. I couldn't help but think that at any second I'd look back and she just wouldn't be there.

If someone wanted to track down Cassie, it wouldn't be hard. I wasn't exactly hiding her, I didn't know that I needed to. A thousand questions ran through my head on the car ride back home. But when I finally pulled into my space, two questions haunted me.

What didn't Angela tell me? And what was I going to do about it?

A/N: So? Anything? Eh? Nothing? Really? Weel, that's great I guess. Come on, throw me a rope here.  
Reviews are blissss!!


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